Just Realize what ' To Lose' means..

Guess what! I've been punished for disrupting class when I didn't do so! It was so unfair, Liz was the one who should be responsible for this! She was the one who started first. But the thing is that Mr.Paul (my homeroom teacher) didn't get me to explain about what happen and just blame me right away.

It was so not fair. But well, i didn't want to argue with him any longer so I walked to the corner and stood there staring at the ground. And Liz!! She didn't say a thing and just sat there doing the classwork with a frown on her face.

When the class is over, I walked back to my seat and prepared my bag without a word. I refused to talk with nobody along the way to the school's gate. While I was walking toward my bike, Liz came and stood in front of me. I didn't say anything but looked at her with a cold face.

'I'm sorry about the punishment, I really didn't want it to be this way' she said.

'Oh really?' I responded. I guessed she had nothing else to say so I continued my walk and ride back home. The day after, we also continued NOT to say a word with each other. In the break time, my whole classmates got out of class and headed to the cafeteria for lunch. But I didn't feel like eating so I stayed in the classroom and just then, Mr.Paul came by my seat and had a talk with me.

'I'm sorry for the misunderstanding of you yesterday, Liz came and told me everything' I was surprised of his words, but without saying a thing I bowed and rushed quickly out to the cafeteria.

I wasn't here for lunch. In fact, I came to see Liz. My intention was to say sorry to her for my rude behavior yesterday. But I guess, she was not here. I could just wait in the room for the next class. But I felt like saying it now. Because if I waited any longer, things might became even worse.

I decided to asked Holly, one of my classmate, if she saw Liz walking here. But then Holly once again surprised me with her words.

'Well just now, I heard that she was resigning from school. Oh! I just saw her walking toward the gate a while ago' I said thanks and quickly ran to the gates through the Hall. Soon after that, I saw Liz with her bag on the back walking out of the hall.

'Wait!' I shouted but it seemed like she didn't hear me. She walked out of the gate and stood there waiting for someone (it might be her parents). But just then, a car came and accidentally bumped into Liz. I, who was standing not far behind, couldn't move a finger. The guards were running to her and called the teacher. Mr.Paul and Mr.Edward came and asked us what has happened. I just couldn't say a thing. I fell to the ground and cried with no reasons. I just realize how it feels to lose someone with your own faults. If i could just forgave her that day..If i could just talked to her as normal...This wouldn't be happening.

Maybe Gods want me to realize the word 'Lose'....to feel how is it to lose someone..and I guessed this was the first time that I wished I could make time turned back... It really does hurt... and after that incident..I couldn't bring myself back to normal.. I think i will feel guilty..for the rest of my life..

P.S Thanks for the reading, and this was just my made-up story for the blog. Anyway, hope you guys enjoy it! Bye~!

-Nina-